31 May 2020

Bella Mackie, writer and wife of Radio 1 DJ Greg James, opens up about ‘dramatic mental health plummet’ after miscarriage

Radio 1 DJ Greg James’ wife Bella Mackie has revealed she suffered terribly with her mental health after experiencing a miscarriage.

The 36-year-old author played down the ordeal, but said the impact she felt came in the form of her OCD flaring up and frequently letting her emotions get the better of her.

Speaking in a personal essay for The Times, she said: "It was a surprise and only lasted for about three weeks; it could barely be called a miscarriage.

"But even in that brief window my mental health plummeted dramatically. I started having constant intrusive thoughts, my OCD roared back and I couldn’t stop crying. The intensity and speed of my deterioration shocked me. And my poor husband."

Mackie admits she is still not in a place where she feels comfortable thinking about having children.

“The baby thought remains vague,” she added. "I am still terrified of the possibility that I might slide back down the treacherous slope and end up losing my independence, or being resentful about what I’ve lost.

"I will keep mulling it over and think about what positive safeguards I can put in place if I do decide to have a baby.

"For now, at least, my life — the one I’ve worked so hard to make happy — is enough for me."

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