Farmers are warning that in Britain there could be a shortage of turkeys for dinner this Christmas.

Graeme Dear, from the British Poultry Council, told MPs that the farming industry “will do our utmost to make sure Christmas is as normal as it can be,” but added, “there is a likelihood there will be a shortage.” Which in turn is likely to leave supermarkets and households in a bit of a flap, because what is Christmas without a burnished turkey on the table?

While it’s a fraught time for farmers, arguably (whisper it) this could be an opportunity to do Christmas dinner a little differently.

The stress of cooking a whole turkey is real

“There’s a reason why we only eat this f****** bird once a year, right? There’s a reason for it. And so many people get it so wrong because they stress out,” says Gordon Ramsay, whose new cookbook Ramsay In 10 (Hodder & Stoughton, £25) has just been released.

He’s certainly right on the whole faff of cooking and eating turkey; for starters it’s a bird that seems naturally designed to fit in neither the fridge or the oven.

When a professional chef considers turkey a logistical culinary nightmare, it makes you seriously wonder why we bother. Sure, it’s a spectacle and keeping up with tradition is comforting – and we could all do with comfort and routine this Christmas – but from a practical perspective, why save a bird we rarely cook (and only just about know how to cook), for the one day of the year when cooking is so crucial?

Ramsay’s advice, if you are going to power on with turkey regardless (ie. go buy one now and beat the rush), is, “get a crown, OK? And don’t worry about trying to cook the whole thing because by time the legs are cooked, the breast is overdone, and then by the time the breasts are cooked, the legs are underdone, and so if you don’t know how to baste that turkey, just get a crown.”

The leftovers can become hard work

People often say reverently, “It’s all about the leftovers,” – but is it? Really? After endless days of turkey curry, turkey and cranberry sandwiches every single lunchtime, and slices of turkey pie seemingly being the only option for a snack (apart from yet more Christmas chocolate), you very quickly get turkey’d out. Admit it, you know it’s true.

Arguably chicken is better anyway…

Turkeys are impressive birds, but if cooked badly, they regrettably tend to dry out. We know it’s the fault of the cook rather than the bird, but roasting a few chickens instead of a whole turkey could really save everyone a lot of time, bother and disappointment.Think of the alternatives

Of course, once you’re liberated from the tyranny of turkey season, you don’t have to sub in another bird. You could go entirely rogue… have a massively decadent lasagne or beef wellington, opt for a sushi platter or seafood feast with whole crabs and lobsters for everyone to crack through messily, host a buffet of your family’s favourite foods, or even just have the Christmas dinner sides – if there’s no turkey, presumably that means you can have triple the number of pigs-in-blankets than normal, and a whole tray of stuffing to yourself. That sounds like a win to us.